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A few weeks ago we wrote an article about everything to do with the G-Spot and squirting. You guys loved it! So, we thought it might be time to actually do some groundwork and review some G-Spot toys that will help you get on your way. First up is the Lovehoney Power Play G-Spot Vibrator review.

So I just want to start with the fact I was amazingly impressed with this toy. Its pros far outweigh the cons but as ever, I will speak about both.

Price

This toy is at such a great price point. It’s €29.95 on Lovehoney. In my opinion that’s an extremely affordable toy however it still lives up to my expectations in terms of quality.

Packaging

The packaging for this toy, as with any Lovehoney own brand toys, is light and quite discreet. It’s not bulky so I found it useful to keep as a storage option for my toy.

Features and Design

Ok, so now we can get into the fun stuff. A lot of thought went into the design of this toy and I have to say, the creators did a great job. The shape is honestly just PERFECT for reaching the g-spot, it’s actually more curved than I thought it would be and more curved than other g-spot toys I’ve used in the past. It’s got a silicone body with a hard plastic interior which means it’s not flexible. I didn’t find the lack of flexibility to be an issue but it can be a little restrictive. No 2 bodies are the same after all.

It’s Latex-Free and Phthalate-Free and it’s submergible in water – all positives! It has 3 vibration speeds and 4 vibration patterns which is great but not any more features than many other vibration toys have.

The only downside I will mention is that it is a battery-powered toy. Now, this is completely personal but I really dislike battery-powered toys. I’d rather just plug in and charge up rather than have to go out and buy a set of batteries that you’ll eventually have to discard anyway. For some reason, I never seem to have the right size batteries in my house either! I’d rather spend the extra little bit initially to have the toy a rechargeable one. But, that’s just me!

The Standout Feature

By far the best part of this toy is the shape. It’s super curved which makes it easy to reach the right spots but it also has a bulbous tip with a circumference of 4 inches. The body of the toy is not super girthy but in my opinion, that’s ideal as it allows you to focus the vibrations on the right area. It’s also got a narrower body which means it’s actually super easy to get inside for those who might find insertion uncomfortable. Its insertable length is about 5 inches, just the right amount to reach the G-Spot. The affordable price of less than €30 is also a standout for me!

Final Thoughts for the Power Play G-Spot Vibrator review

This toy is honestly an all-rounder. It’s great for a beginner who wants to get started on G-Spot play but will also be enjoyed by someone who has a bit more experience. The price point is great for what it delivers and the issue I had with the batteries was all forgotten once I got the right ones and started using the toy. Would I recommend this toy to a friend – most definitely! When I got the Lovehoney Power Play G-Spot Vibrator to review I was unsure but it’s been wonderful for exploring G-Spot sensations!

 

Desire and Arousal

Let me briefly break down these two terms. I’ve already covered the basics of sexual motivation and desire. In the simplest of terms, desire is the experience of wanting to engage in sex. Arousal encompasses the physical and psychological events that happen. Sexual response is a collective term for both of these.

What is a model?

A scientific model is not an exact description of reality, it’s a representation created to help us understand complex ideas and processes (like sexual response). I’m going to talk about one popular model, but there are many more!

The Dual Control Model

In the last two decades since it was created, Dr. John Bancroft and Dr. Erick Janssen’s Dual Control Model of sexual response has been used in scientific research, education and even mainstream media (you may have even heard of it already!).

The easiest way to understand the systems of the Dual Control Model is by using the metaphor of the ‘accelerator’ and ‘brake’. The accelerator is ‘sexual excitation’ (what turns you on) and the brake is ‘sexual inhibition’ (what turns you off).

So how does this model help us understand sexual response?

We all vary greatly in terms of how strong our accelerators and brake are, and what hits each one is very different for everyone. There are so many combinations! Figuring out how sensitive each of your ‘pedals’ are and what internal and external things hit each one is very helpful.

It’s also useful to remember that, just like in a car, the brake serves a purpose. Never taking your foot off the accelerator is not a safe way to drive!

Here are some scenarios where sexual inhibition is necessary:

  • the situation could harm you physically, emotionally or socially
  • there is an external distraction that interrupts you
  • you have a more pressing need to take care of

The Dual Control Model doesn’t describe what’s going on physiologically or psychologically during sexual response. However, it’s a great tool for understanding what factors inflence our internal processes.

Practical Advice

I love that this model provides a simple framework to list what excites you sexually and what inhibits or stops your sexual response. Making these lists can help you figure out what you can do in the future to maximise pleasure!

Here are some questions to ask yourself while thinking of times you felt turned on/off in the past…

  • Where were you?
  • What were you doing?
  • Who were you with?
  • Were there sounds, smells, images, tastes, sensations involved?

Be as specific or abstract as you want!

I’ve drawn up a template that you can save and fill in using the questions above as prompts. If you feel like sharing your lists with us, we’d love to see them! You can send them to us on Instagram.

 

 

What is libido?

Libido can seem like a mystical force. Sometimes it visits at the wrong time and overstays its welcome, or it’s nowhere to be found when we could really use it. If you’ve ever found yourself frustrated with your libido, you’re not alone!

Research on sexual motivation is still progressing, but there are some takeaways from existing research that can help you demystify your libido.

Does sex drive exist?

Most sex researchers agree that sex is not a ‘drive’, it’s a motivational system. The difference is that intrinsic drives are fuelled by lack of something (food, sleep, social connection), but sexual motivation is fuelled by an attractive reward. Sex can be great, but we don’t need it to survive!
(Note: sometimes we’ll still use the term ‘sex drive’ when talking about libido, but we don’t mean it literally!)

How does libido work?

Sexual desire is usually triggered by something in your environment that reminds you of sex, but can also be triggered by thoughts or imagination. Sometimes it can come seemingly out of nowhere, which could be a good or bad thing depending on where you are at the time!

The link between sexual desire and physical response is not always straightforward (see below), but usually one results in the other, and they continue in a ‘positive feedback loop’ (both cause an increase in each other). This exists alongside another positive feedback loop, which happens between an attractive incentive and arousal. Arousal increases how attractive something is to us, which increases our arousal!

Here’s an example of these loops at work; you’re watching a partner undress, your body responds, their body becomes more attractive, your desire increases, your body responds more… and so on!

My body says yes, but my mind says no (or vice versa)

Sexual motivation usually results in physical arousal, but that’s not always the case. You can feel sexual desire without becoming physically aroused or vice versa. This can be frustrating or confusing, and it’s important to recognise that it isn’t abnormal. Sometimes it takes more time for your body to catch up with your mind, or the other way around.

It’s also normal to feel like you want something and then realise you’re not enjoying it. Wanting and liking don’t always go together with sex. Take your time and be kind to yourself. Always practice consent and good communication with yourself and others. Instead of getting frustrated with your libido, practice being patient with yourself!

Stress and mood

Your mood can directly or indirectly influence your libido. The effect is different for everyone, but it’s good to think about how you’re feeling if your libido isn’t working how it usually does. For some people, stress and low mood can actually increase sexual motivation. Some individuals also use sex to cope with short term stress. Long-term stress or low mood usually reduces libido.

Some medications can also have an effect on libido, for example, birth control or SSRIs.

Am I normal?

Yes! It’s normal for libidos to fluctuate, weekly, monthly and over the course of a lifetime. It’s also normal to feel a little bewildered with your sex drive sometimes. Everyone gets frustrated with their libido at some point in their lifetime. If you are happy with your sexual appetite right now, then there’s nothing to worry about. If you’re worried about how much sex you should be having, the answer is usually as much or as little as you want to! Click here for more on how much sex you should be having.